What is going on

Long time no blog. So the last time I blogged about something/someone I was a little mad and still in shock over what was going on. I forgot the cover up name I had for you and personally want to make a better name for you. You are male friend. When you apologized to me a couple of months ago I was in shock and questioned it, a couple weeks into it I wanted to still hate you, and now we're here, months down the road and I've realized that I am really happy you are my friend again, and I get to call you friend. You may mention my other friends names and I'm okay with that, reason being we're friends, friends talk about others if they're concerned or worried about the other, or if you haven't spoken in a long time. I realized that when we hung out yesterday, when we were talking about my best friend.. I'm glad you two are fixing things up and I'm glad I was the one to make this move. I don't want to have two of my friends not get along, it's just weird. I wan us to be a happy friend family, better then last time though.
Like I've said, 2012 is the summer of change, Go and CHANGE something with the months you have off!
So far a lot has changed in my life, one of them being my perspective of life and no negative energy, inviting the "enemy" back into my life and making him a friend again, eating healthier and enjoying life!
Have fun with your life because you never know when time will be up!
Talk to you later summer people!
February 

Prom-posals

So, prom is coming up.. not that I'm going this year, but I've thought about it and, I think I'm going to help you guys and girls on what some girls might want or dream about on how to propose to prom.
Well, it's how I'd like to be asked, but a lot of other girls probably wouldn't mind these ideas.
Tips:

• Be romantic and thoughtful on how you'll ask that special someone
• don't be disappointed if they say no
• stay positive and happy no matter the outcome
• don't be nervous

Ideas:

1. scavenger hunt:

okay, I know it sounds weird but, hey is always cute to send them on a scavenger hunt to find you... best thing to do, leave your identity a mystery.. you will be the prize at the end of the hunt. 

Start by leaving a note on her locker, and try and make the messages rhyme and maybe leave a flower pedal

 ( her favourite flower) with each note just to tie it all together. Don't keep the hunt to long, try and keep it short but not too short. At the end, have you standing there, maybe in a mask, with a note asking prom? and her favourite flowers in your hand (don't be cheap and use the flower you used to take the flower pedals off -.-). Then reveal yourself and take the mask off :) 

{this is a good idea if your prom theme is masquerade} 

2. gifts:

another weird one, but I don't mean like; "Oh, here, I bought you tons of gifts and spent more money on this then I did on my laptop!" no, I mean, it's the thought that counts, so I find it romantic when a person, tries to find some of my favourite things out about me and give them to me.. an example, what's their favourite coffee/how do they take their coffee? what's their favourite flower? favourite sports team? what's their favourite colour? 

For me, I like my Mocha café coffee from Tim Hortons, daisies are my favourite flower, Go Chicago Black Hawks! and I like the colour yellow. So I'd find it kind of romantic if the person who wants to ask me to prom, was at my locker one morning with my favourite coffee, in a Chicago Black Hawks jersey

 (or in my favourite colour of shirt), as well as holding a bunch of colourful daisies. That's just flat out sweet because you took the time to figure out what their favourites are. (Sometimes it's easy to find this stuff out by, asking their friends or stalking their facebook profile or throwing this questions into conversations with the person, but not all of these questions in the same conversation though).

3. A planned date:

If your already dating, or are just friends, ask them to go out with you, don't make it seem like a date however, call it an adventure. Go and do something they'd be interested in. Spend the day with them. 

An example, ask them if they want to go on an adventure with you, pack a picnic lunch, heck maybe even make the lunch together to bond a little bit, go out for a hike if they like hiking, or maybe just go for a ride in he car to a nice park, or take a nice trip on the subway (but have a nice destination, example a park). Once you get there just hang out, have a picnic in the park, at the end, when having a pudding cup for dessert, or cupcake, either mention, "hey, proms coming and I was wondering if you want to maybe go with me?" make it official with something of there favourite (ex. flower). Or go into the bag you carried the lunch in and pull out a note that asks "Prom?" Make it special and make it something you would do and memorable. 

Well, those are just a few of my ideas on how to ask someone to prom, or maybe just to ask someone out.. 

Just a few reminders, make it special, make it yours, and whatever you do... DON'T ASK THEM OUT OVER THE COMPUTER OR TEXT MESSAGE!  That just makes you look really wimpy as well as make it easier to say no too.  Never ask someone out behind a screen. That's just terrible, at least have the courage to call them and ask, although, that's still pretty easy to say no too. Make the effort, take the time, Do it in person... All I have to say is, GOODLUCK!  I believe you'll all do fine in asking that special someone to go to prom with you or to date you. 

Sincerely,

FEBRUARY :)

Time to suck it Up and in

So, the good weather is starting to show itself, which is always a good thing, but it always means time to buckle into the school work and get in those projects. With balancing school, co-op, friends and family I barely have time to blog or exercise. Which is terrible, but, any minute I have free, I go with exercise first then blogging (sorry). You probably wondering what the heck February, what's up with your title, well, with a great 2 seasons ahead of us, I've decided to just suck it up, work is work, hard or easy it's just work and it has to be done, dealing with people in school sucks, but you know what, only like 2 months left we can all suck it up! And the suck it in part refers to exercise. Girls, Guys, hey you sitting behind your computer complaining about "If only I could lose a few pounds", yeah you! I'm no doctor but I know starving yourself isn't healthy and neither is sitting on your butt doing nothing, so, here's some tips for those who want to slim down the gut, eat health, not less, not more, just healthy. Instead of sitting at the computer with chips, hows about some carrot sticks, or veggie sticks, and don't slouch! it's better if you sit up straight, posture can make you look taller and slimmer!
Are you saying to yourself every Saturday afternoon, "oh I'm so bored, I know, facebook/twitter/ computer time", just no! get on those good walking/ running shoes, plug in the great music you love listening to (up to beat/ happy music) and go for a walk, jog or run. I find when I walk, I suck in  my gut that I have, and you can feel muscles tightening, but the best way to get rid of a gut is sit ups and crunches after the walk/run/jog. Trust me people, long @$$ walks pay off in every way possible. It's a great stress reliever and a great work out, For me I go for an hour long walk during the week (when i can, I mean, an hour a day)  and on Saturday, I normally go for a good 2 hour walk. Now I'm not trying to force you to go that long, but, go for a good half an hour at least, instead of complaining. People! let's wake up the world and change what we do and how we feel about ourselves, I'm tired of hearing everyone complain about their body, either embrace your body or change it, but don't complain about it and expect things to change over night, you have to make the first move in a step for a better tomorrow.
Try to change for the better good people, you'll feel better about yourself a lot more if you do..

Until next time people of the world, 

February 

Are you serious?

You wonder why our friendship ended on bad terms... you ever consider the fact that you were obsessed with my best friend? I forgave you like two weeks ago and now you're just going back to being obsessed with her and having to bring her up in conversation... Seriously? Are you actually doing this again? I don't want to base our friendship off of me knowing her and you being obsessed with her. I GET IT! You like my best friend more then friends, and you can't have her, but leave her out of our friendship! All I ask for.. Is that too much to ask?
-.-
Sincerely,
February

To be Happy you need Happiness

Today, for some reason I was mad, not really why, maybe it's because you showed up to school and you didn't even say hi to me, which is the main reason why I always asked you if you were my friend. I don't believe you understand what friendship is or understand how it works. In order to have a working relationship, doesn't matter if it's a friendship or a dating relationship, or any relationship it takes TWO to make a working, stable relationship, not just one. If there's only one person doing all the work in the relationship, then why bother even apologizing?
Hmm... by writing that all out I guess I found the reason for my mood to change from happiness to anger.
Well any ways, because of this mood swing that hit me like a brick, I found the best way for me to let out my anger.. running, I went for a run today, and it felt great just to run and cry a bit and express every emotion I was feeling. Hello weekly runs, Hello Happiness!
Spring has sprung in my step, 1 more step close to summer of change!
Sincerely,
February

Out Of the Blue

Last Night, you apologized to me, it took us both nine months to realize it was stupid before, but when you did apologize, I didn't believe you, until today when my friend told me how you were talking about how much you really want to be my friend and apologize to me. When my friend told me this, I realized the truth, It's time to let go of the past and start new. So, let's do it, let's start new and become friends.
Sincerely,
February

Happiness fell upon me

Today, I got to see you for the first time in months. I became so happy and I smiled. I smile every time I think of you. Service boy, you're awesome, and if just the thought of you makes me smile, you're pretty intense. I'm just nervous that my little crush might have turned into much more. You give me butterflies, and I really like that feeling when it comes down to it with you. I really want to see you again, maybe when you're not working :)
Sincerely,
February <3

Holding a Grudge... Forget about it!

Yesterday I realized,  holding onto a grudge is still just holding onto you, and I realized inorder for me to totally remove myself from you, i have to totally let go of everythning. And, so here I am, I am letting go of the grudge I hold against your friends and you. Summer of change, has now started in Spring :)
Hello New Beginning
February 

Frustration, Anger, Annoyance, Jealousy,Sadness, Disappointment

I am disturbed by a lot currently, and disappointed, and jealous and.. just to much.... Lately I've been feeling very much not like myself.
 I feel like there is something super wrong with me, and I've been scaring myself a lot.
I've started to plan my summer, I call it, 2012; Summer of Change...  With the worry of my diagnosis on what I might have, I've have decided to make a huge change in my life style.
In order to over come the jealousy and the sadness, the anger and the disappointment, changes need to be done. I really want the summer to come now.

Word of the Wise~
you can over come your evils.. put your mind to it,I believe in you.
Sincerely,
February :) 

What is Wrong with me?

This just started on Monday, I've been feeling really tired, angry, lonely, and not hungry at all. My daily routine, wake up, get ready for the day, go to school, go to co-op, come home and sleep, not even my homework gets done. I don't want to eat because I'm not hungry and I don't get to see my friends with the schedule I'm on right now. I know I want to feel happy, and I know I can't be depressed because, I don't feel depressed, I am happy don't get me wrong just little things here and there upset me, anger me, make me feel lonely but, I am happy just super tired. I don't know any more...
February

I was Right; and now I'm scared

I was right, you took no interest in me last night, I wanted you too, but you didn't and I believe you won't ever.
If I was right about my first prediction, then I'm scared my next prediction of me not having a relationship until I'm 30 will come true too, or I'll be alone forever. Well where do I find my 30 cats?
-.-
February 

Okay then...

So last night in my dream it was really weird but felt so really, but you know Daniel Radcliffe? The young man who plays Harry Potter and Arthur Kipp in The Woman in Black, well he was in my dream. My parents were his chauffeurs, so I got to meet him. Then all of a sudden we were together as a couple living in England on a big lot of land, which my cousins lived there too, but I've never met these people, any ways, I was going to school there too a private school, and Daniel was never around. Then he came home and stayed with us for a bit.
That's when the realism flew out the window, because then he started turning into a mad man, and turned into a werewolf, but no worries it ended well, we got married and I became a teacher at the private school....
Really weird!
February 

Why do you do this to me?

Why should I have to choose who to celebrate my birthday with? If I want to celebrate with both friend A and friend B. For one day you should just suck it up and be together. If you choose to leave it's practically saying we're not friends, I just came to have something to do, and that I really don't care about you. It's basically a kick in the face. Don't do that to me, at least not on my birthday.

Sincerely,

February 

Why? Why can't I sleep?

My mind runs wild sometimes, tonight and for the last two nights it's been out of control. I'm nervous for my first day of co-op, scared for my birthday party thingy, unfinished homework, grade 12 , also can't wait to see Mr.lacrosse man, and at the same time can't stop thinking about him. I'm now going to Google my problem of non sleeping and find an answer to help me sleep...
Let's hope I get some sleep soon.
February

I feel like I can tell what's going to happen

I've thought about you too much, and made it too obvious, I believe you're going to tell me what every other boy has told me, "you're great but, not for me..." then we'll continue our friendship... Am I forever alone? or do I just feel forever alone? Fingers are still crossed that a spark will happen this weekend, but a strong doubt is still there... Show up soon in my life guy who won't make me feel forever alone please.
Sincerely,
Forever alone, 
February

What the hell?!

WHY am I thinking of you? I can't stand you, we broke our friendship off many months ago. WHY?! maybe it's because you're birthday is coming up, and I'm wondering if I should be nice enough to write on your wall even though you're a total ass hole. Does HBD give off the message of, hey, I hate you, but I'm trying to be nice, or should I waste my time and write out the whole happy... yeah you know the sentence,but then you might go all psycho and continue to think I'm  madly in love with you...
well, the message I REALLY want to send  to you is, Happy birthday Ass hole, hope you stub you big toe on the corner of a very pointy table. :)
Sincerely,
February 

The countdown begins

Only a few more days until I get to see you again. It's been forever since I've seen you... I miss you Mr.Lacrosse player, I hope you've missed me too. We've been talking for a little bit lately, and you've asked if I like anyone and I know I've made myself obvious to you and how I feel, I hope you've picked up on those messages I've been sending you, and maybe you'll make my birthday a little bit more special.. 

February

Keep on dreaming; you'll get it soon!

Great news! I got what I've worked hard for! My placement, I've waited nearly a year for it, and now I have it. The greatest phone call I've ever had!
Just goes to show, you get what you dream of, if you've work your butt off for it!
Sincerely,
February

I want to be that girl

I want to be the girl you like.
Girl you cuddle, the girl you kiss the girl that you make laugh.
I want to be the girl that makes you smile, and hold your hand.
I want to be the girl that you feel comfortable crying in front of, because a guy who shows his true feelings is a man who is sexy and hot, not childish or wimpy.
I want to be the girl that you like..
I want to be the girl you randomly hug, and kiss my forehead,
I want to be the girl to go to all of your games and cheer you on, and even if you lose, I tell you it's okay, I still love you.
I want to be the girl that makes you your favourite foods and desserts whenever I can, and when every you want them.
I want to be that girl you like...
Sincerely,
February

You don't know or understand.

We've been best of friends for 11 years now. We've had our ups and downs. I've told you all of my secrets. I've told you the struggles I've been experiencing, but i don't think you care, you're more concerned about you're own life... I guess that's fine, you can continue to not listen, and be in your own world, but realize that, this attitude won't get you anywhere. When I asked you how much I owe you, you respond with you know, but personally I don't. I have more things to worry about then that, and so I forget to tell you who's coming to the mall with us,  I have more important things to worry about... You can continue to have your little bitterness, but realize that this attitude won't get you anywhere. Just grow up, I'm tired of dealing with childish ways and attitudes.
I've been debating this now for a while, but are you even worth being my friend if I have to worry about what I tell you in case you have a bitch fit?
Once you tell me how much I owe you, and I pay you, I think we should just take a break for a few weeks...
Please understand and open your eyes and your ears, there's important things passing you and you're missing them all.
Sincerely,
February 

Difference between...

Dear people in my third period class.... yes I want to be a police officer one day maybe, not a lawyer.. when you asked me "why don't you want to be a lawyer, because being a police officer is the same thing as a lawyer."
Hate to break it to you but they're not... AT ALL! First of all they only relate because they fall under the field of work in law.. that's the only way they are similar.
Police fight crime, they put the bad behind bars.
Lawyers fight for "the right" of people... the way I see it, a lawyer is hired to defend both the guilty and the innocent. They defend the ones put behind bars....for the crime they committed, the guilty ones... I'm sorry I refuse to help a murder get out of prison by playing the, mentally unstable card or he's really sorry for what he did, or my client did not commit this crime... NOT HAPPENING!
Being a Police officer and a Lawyer are two different careers, not the same at all....
I had to get that off my chest...

February

Valentine's Day

February 14th, the day that you either love or hate, you're either pro-Valentine's day or anti-Valentine's day.
I personally don't mind it. I find I celebrate it on my own most of the time by making myself a good meal, wear comfortable clothes like sweat pants, my hair in a messy bun, have my fuzzy peaches and watch a variety of movies, I guess, I am my own Valentine and in a way, my own best boyfriend, I mean, I buy exactly what I want, I let myself have my "ugly" days, I put make-up on if I want to, I find myself pretty no matter what, the only thing I can't do is give myself my own boyfriend hug which I'd love to have....
Mr.Valentine where are you? I need a hug and a Daisy maybe...
February

Blah.

There's so much going on in my life right now I feel, yet I don't have that much. I guess I just have a lot going on in my mind and I've been wondering and worrying about a lot lately.
 Will I get this placement that I really want? and if I do get it, how behind will I fall? Will I like it?
 Why hasn't he texted me back? I thought we're friends?
 Will everything go smooth this month?
 I hope my birthday celebration goes well.
 Did I pass all of my first semester classes? Will I reach my goal of an 80% average at the end of this year? Will I be going to summer school this year to get ahead of the game next year?
Are people looking at me weirdly because I dyed my hair?
Does that boy from English like me? Why does he keep looking at me in the halls? Why is he so polite and hang out with the ass holes of the school?
Will the idea I have to change my hair next work out as well as I hope it does?
 Should I be worried about all of this?
These are probably the reasons I can't sleep at night.
Ughh....
February

Just can't stop

dear lacrosse player, I've been thinking about you all day and what we could be, and trust me I've lost myself in my own train of thought. I can't wait to see you again, to hear your voice to feel your touch. If only we were going to see each other sooner then later. I miss you strongly, but I still don't know how I really feel about you....
Sincerely,
February

Learning something new

So, my cousin has now got me interested in sign language, and so, she has been teaching me some as well as I've been teaching myself some with the Internet. So far I know how to count to 11, say good-night, hello, my name is, boy, girl, mom, dad and yes. For some reason I find this language really fun to learn!
Anyways off I go to learn some more,
February

What should I say?

Dear Mr.Lacrosse boy,
We have a past, yes we do. Nothing much just a friendly past. We flirt back and forth, but state we're friends. You make me feel better about myself, I enjoy your company you makes me laugh. You've called me cute, and I didn't ask what you thought about me. You remembered my birthday and when I asked you if you'll be celebrating me, you said you will unless you have lacrosse. I told you, I hope you don't, you replied with I hope I don't either. You make me smile and make me feel special.

February

Exams

It's exam time now. Time to get ready to pass every class I have right now and get a high average so I can finally be happy with myself and my grades.

February

Had A Weird Dream

Mr. Guitar-Car Man,
it's been a while since I've written about you let alone dreamt about you. This dream was so weird, I was working at the bar that our parents go to, and you were there with your parents. Your parents told you to talk to me, once you started to talk to me, I realized your were drunk and I found it funny, but all you kept saying to me was, I need to find a bed, I need to sleep. o we walked out of the bar together, and all of a sudden we were at school sitting on the benches, with you sitting on the right of me. You handed me your laptop which was broken and had no keys on the keyboard. My friend was there and we were both laughing at it. All of a sudden i became sleepy (in my dream? makes total sense right?) and my head started to fall to your shoulder, where i fell asleep, and you whispered something, but I never heard what you said. I then woke up from everything, and questioned the whole thing.
I still want to get to know you, anytime you want to talk to me I'm ready to talk to you.
Sincerely,
February

You,sir, upset me.....

(Contains harsh wording)

Dear dick-head,
Way to be mature. Sure I probably was in the wrong with telling the teacher what you sent me, but the way you were treating the rest of the group was very dick like and low even for you. Did you ever think that maybe you should have told us that you didn't want anything to do with us and could care less? Nope, of course not, why? You're self centred, and yes I am very aware that you are having some health conditions, but that doesn't excuse you from ignoring our text and running away from the project completely. Thanks for leaving us alone ass-face. There's the door out of my life, see ya!

Sincerely,
February

Just a Kiss; song posts;

*******I'm running out of titles for my posts as you can probably tell, so from now on, I'll be making the title the song I'm listening to the title or the theme of the post ***********


So, while listening to Just a Kiss by Lady Antebellum, it's made me realize somethings and qualities I want from a boyfriend.... yeah I know I get mushy like rotten food, but hey, get over it! I am a GIRL so deal! or hit the wheel! :D
Qualities I want are simple little things; he has to be nice, knows how to use sarcasm at the right time, make me smile, gives the greatest hugs ever in the world, uhmm, have plans for the future or an idea at least (school after school, career choice maybe), meets my parents, is able to talk and "hang-out" with my parents, accepts my random side heck, accepts me for me! uhmm, treats me well, jokes around with me and kisses me on my forehead... I think it means a lot when a guy kisses me on my forehead.

Well, those are just some of the qualities I want, well yeah, I'm not that shallow of a person I don't like liking someone for their looks, I look for qualities and personality.
Until next post bloggers,
February

untitled

My birthday is coming, and I'm excited. I don't know why exactly, but I am. What do I want for my birthday you ask? Not much actually, I could ask for a car, or a dog, or something big and expensive, but I'm not that type of person. I don't expect a lot nor do I want a lot. All I want is to spend my birthday with my friends, watch a scary movie, hang out and maybe meet someone who is.... special we'll just say ;)
I'm not a person who wants a lot or needs a lot, I'm pretty great like that, not to sound cocky or anything I swear :P
Febraury

Last Day: Serivce Boy

To Service Boy,as you know, yesterday was my last day, and somehow it was the best day I ever had, but over all the experience I had working there was awesome but there will always be one person who will stick out from the rest, and will always be you. You always knew how to make me smile and laugh.
 But the one memory I will always remember is....
the only hug you gave me, which was last night and it was the best hug I've ever had :) it wasn't to tight but it wasn't to genital just right.
Hope to see you soon so you can give me another.

Sincerely,
February

Resolutions

To the New Year Resolutions, I found a loop hole....My New Year Resolution is to turn another year older! something that is hard to break.. HA!

February

But, if you really want my New Year Resolution list it's to:
1.  get a laptop to help with my schooling and to blog more. ;)

2. smile more.
3. find something to love/ love doing.
4. Make ONE new friend.
5. go on one date. 
6. that's it I guess.
Not that big of goals, not really goals at all but, are HUGE deals to me. I mean for one, I'm shy so making friends is harder then it seems, two, smiling is a weird thing to me, I'm not one to smile very often, three I LOVE to spend money and question where it all went after 2 weeks of going broke, four, I don't have enough time to find a hobby, and five, dating has never,ever, been my thing, I've never really experienced a real first date before and not a lot of people take interest in a girl like me, I'm just too unique I guess you can say...
Well, I'm off for the night,
Good-Luck to those who have resolutions and plan to stick with them, and Good-Luck to everyone and their New Year. Here's to 2012, just another year,
February